Free Shiot Friday: FREE HOUSE!

Well, Shut the F&$K YOU! A FREE HOUSE is pretty much the end all/be all of my Free Shiot Friday posts. I mean...WHAT?!:

Full style slapping, full on about my entire face!!!! This Old House June 2014 mag has TAKEN US THERE with this!!! Can any one of my Ohio family (or friends) please go get this house? Seriously? Or, for that matter, anyone on the interwebs who sees this post and wants a fabulous house, FOR FREE, please go get this!!!!???? I am BEYOND that houses like this firstly-- are ever just "left vacant" to begin with and secondly-- are available for FREE. The shiot is 5,561 s.f. with 4 bedrooms and 5 baths! It needs "significant repairs and updates" and the bank whose giving away the keys to this freebie Queen Anne will only do so if y'all have a serious game plan and serious cash to WERK THIS HOUSE OUT!!! To sweeten the deal, I will donate my mad decorating skillz to any one of my friends or family who hop on this FREE SHIOT FRIDAY HOUSE REALNESS! Go grab it UP, Hunty's and let's fulfill your Queen Anne DREAMZZZ!

Lucite Shelf Lovely

Consider y'all-selves STYLE SLAPPED full on about the face!!!! Yasssss! Presenting lucite shelf & vintage brass bracket REALNESS:

SO thrilled at how this project turned out! I just LURV everything about it-- the combo of materials: lucite, brass and cast iron. The fact that the candleholders appear to be floating sculpture. Also j'adore that I was able to utilize the wall space BEHIND the shelf for even MORE value hanging style storage. Also lurving: the whole situ doesn't feel heavy. Sometimes display shelves that are mounted really high like this have a tendency to visually weigh down the room, but this just feels so light and airy to me.

And TRUST that it's super SAFE-- there are two screws and two anchors in each bracket. Speaking of, the installation (thx Dyl) was really straightforward and just involved measuring the overall length of the wall, the lucite shelf and then dividing out equally where each brackets were to go. Then we traced the bracket holes, installed them and put the shelf in place. When we started, it looked like this:

I'd say for the $30 or so I spent on this project, total lucite shelf dreamzzzz have been fulfilled! What do y'all think?!

Chic Shelf 2

Y'all, last week, major dreamzzz were fulfilled when I scored a lucite shelf to display my Dansk cast iron candleholder hoard on:

Now, this fabulousness needs to be hung, and hung well-- if y'all know what I'm talkin' about! OH SHIOT! Seriously, the candleholders are cast iron, so safety must be accomplished here, but I'm certainly not sacrificing chic-ery in the process either. I'm not THAT giving! I want the shelf to appear as if it's floating on the wall, like this:

I've seen those brackets for glass shelves-- surely there's something out there for an 8' long shelf? I mean, 8' is pretty standard in terms of shelf length, right? Here goes PJ down the diy rabbit hole...see folks, this shiot happens to me ALL THE TIME. Cool idea, then trying to find the pieces and parts to make said cool idea a reality-- isn't always cool. In fact hardly EVER. Many, many a day/week/month is spent searching all over for the right piece to make an idea work. And more oft than not, I have to end up making what I need. Guess that's how I got my DIY groove on in the first place. Custom IS next to Godliness. But for this, I really didn't sink too much time into finding a potential bracket, b/c we were already trolling Big Reuse when we found the shelf, it didn't take too long to uncover this baby, which, naturally, someone had put in a corner...the SHADE:

This is a chrome, glass door metal bracket of sorts (think it was originally intended for a shower door?)...it's almost as long as the shelf and has pre-existing mounting holes. It's almost a perfect fit on one side of the shelf. And it's only $8. This place is SERVING ME SERIOUS VALUE, y'all!

There's gonna need to be some hardcore safety mounting to my wall for this scenario-- but honestly, y'all, ALL mounting should be safe -- YES! I'll also have to secure the lucite shelf from below (note the pre-existing holes on underside of bracket) for even more OCD safety. In theory, this SHOULD work. I think. Dylan, cast here as 'hunky engineer', seems more confident about this method, but kindly reminds me that the SAFEST solution would be to use L brackets...how thoughtful. 'Cause y'all know looking at a narsty bracket holding up all my cast iron sculpture is the very definition of artful display. But what if my L brackets were pretty AND functional? Enter lucite L bracket from stage right, betch:

Are you kidding me with THIS? GORG! The problem here is these brackets are custom and run $15 EACH. I need at least 4. Kinda spendy for me, since the shelf was only $5. Then I started thinking about alternate L brackets made from metal that I wouldn't mind looking at and immediately I thought of brass! Holla! If y'all aren't aware, brass is baaaaaack! Way back. And the combo of brass and lucite is giving me a raging case of style chills. Taking to the interwebs like a brass bat outta hell, here's what I dug up:

Simple, straightforward and available in a few sassy finishes from Signature Hardware, but the polished brass shiot cost $32.95 EACH. How rude.

These antiqued brass babies from Liz's Antique Hardware are also kinda hawt:

But at $95 EACH they got real ugly, real quick. Damn! Why has brass gotta break a betch?! These kids from House of Antique Hardware are cute, and at $11.95/each, they're not cra cra, but I'm not convinced I could write home about them:

Then, I started searching for generic, simple brackets that I could potentially spray paint gold. Rabbit hole, right? SEE!!! Though, gotta say that the spray on metallics don't always melt in my mouth. But then shut the F&$K y'all, look what I found on Ebay! WHAT?!?!?!?:

2-set of vintage Baldwin brass shelf bracket babies for $10 value dollas!!! Betch got me 2 sets (total 4 brackets) for $20 + shipping!!!! Now, that's some good and tasty, DIY y'all...Yum!

I mean. #brassobsessed. Needless to say, I'm MORE THAN happy about these brackets and how amazing they're going to look paired with my lucite shelf! Be sure to check back for the big brass betch REVEAL soon!

It's FRIDAY and there's FREE SHIOT

This lady was hanging out in front of our building:

Real potential for chic-ery? Or is she just too exhausted to even bother?

The upholstery decided it was DONE prob a decade or more BEFORE she even landed here, so obvi, re-upholstery would be in order. I do like her overall silhouette, which I find slightly...clutch your pearls...MODERN, despite the cra cra REGALIA woodwork that's absolutely style-slapping us all quickly about the face. She's boxy yet bodacious-- which makes for a HAWT combo:

Imagine this gal's woodWERK lacquered in black (or white, even) with some incredible fabric, like these?

YASSSSSSSSSSSS!

I mean:

I think this lady has a lotta life left in her! Sure hope somebody scooped her up and is gonna do right by her! Now, go do right by y'all-selves, take to the streets and get you some free shiot-- happy Friday!!!

The Shelf that Style-Slapped Me

Y'all, it's gettin' all DIY Dirrrrrty up in HERE! Uh huh! One of my collections needs a serious real estate upgrade in our salon/office. YES betch, we call the second living room/office our salon-- y'all don't? I mean. My vintage Dansk cast iron candleholders need a new perch-- There's at least 15 in the hoard, prob more. Here's what they look like now, more or less:

That's the LESS shot, b/c what y'all don't see is how they're all kinds of jimmy-jammed together so closely they're pretty much stacked atop one another across the entire length of that 6' long slate ledge. And there's some on an adjacent bookcase. And some tucked inside a drawer. And on the bar cart. Y'all get the point.

I've always been a big believer in making my walls WERK for me-- esp. in a NYC apt, where floorspace is limited and/or there's no furniture to properly display a 15+ collection-- say, a 20' dining table, or 15' wide china cabinet, for instance. Y'all feel me. Initially I was thinking a glass shelf b/c the candleholders are so sculptural, viewing them from below, as well as front view, seemed way cool to me. But that's a logistical nightmare beyond belief b/c y'all did see that part above wherein the words, CAST IRON were typed, yes? That wasn't just me trying to be all 'fancy descriptive writer'...this shiot is HEAVY. Then I thought of a reclaimed wood shelf, like everyone else on planet earth...and I do live in Brooklyn, where it seems to grow. But I can't get on board with that. Pun intended-- comedy GOLD! Same with metal, b/c y'all know, vintage industrial...blah blah...BLART yourselves! What to do? THIS!:

That fine hunk of man is holding a lucite shelf! WHAT?! Also known as plexi-glass or acrylic. This bad boy was found recently at a salvage surplus building materials store called, Big Reuse. And the shiot cost $5!!!!!! Shut the F&*K YOU, I'm not kidding! 8' long by 6.5" wide by 1/4" thick. $FIVE DOLLAS. Let's get another look at that value nonsense:

OK, so, y'all see my glass shelf dreamzzz are totally becoming fulfilled with this piece of plexi-glass perfection, yes? It's not quite as wide as I'd like, but for $5, baby can WERK with it. Now, how to hang it safely and chic-ly? Y'all are gonna have to check back into the 'dazzle a little later for that...trust that there's all kinds of hanging shelf realness that y'all don't want to miss...oh, and happy Friday-- time to rage 'til the break of dawn!

A blouse becomes a room!

Y'all I was style-slapped full on when I spotted this fab blouse/coat at an upstate vintage boutique several months ago:

The colors, the pattern, the quilting...I mean...shut the F%&K YOU?!:

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I've been known to SLAY THEM with all kinds of blouse realness in my day, but rather than rock this betch as intended, I got revved up thinking on how amazing she'd look as a room! So behold, y'all...using this blouse as my jumping off point, here's what I came up with:

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Apologies for my lame photoshop skillzzz...but, y'all get what kinds of living room dreamzzz are being fulfilled here, right? Are you just DYING?

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Lurv! The fuschia sofa is just serving LIFE. Then the mix of leather and rattan side chairs provide great texture, but also help dial down some of that sofa LIFE. 'Cause believe it or not y'all, I DID try and imagine that a man might live in this room (see green leather chair), along with his scrumptiously chic, wife-about-town. Oh and they're unlimited budget. To this end, I also thought the moroccan inspired rug really helped to ground all the glamour that's oozing all over the place b/c of it's neutral color and texture. And I just lurv how the trellis pattern plays off the quilted pattern in the blouse. Same with the tufted seat cushion of the LIFE sofa. The coffee table, light fixture, console, mirror, floor lamp (yes, that giant gold leaf thing is a floor lamp and sad panda alert: sold out on eBay), bench (also sold out on Huntersalley, pillows (1, 2, 3, 4 & 5)...even the artwork (1, 2, 3) are just slaying me. Oh and I can't forget that sheepskin slung in that rattan chair and that sweet side table-- both IKEA-- I KNOW, right?!

Y'all, this room is BEYOND HAWT! Of course, I could've kept going for days, adding more and more 'licious...but, I think it's an awesome mix of high/low, chic/silly and totally nails the concept of blouse as room. What do y'all think?